Ringing in Goals and Aspirations and Leaving What Doesn't Serve You
Happy New Year! We have officially survived 2020. We worked through the ups, the downs, the boredom, the craziness, and the life changes. It’s time to ring in the new year with not resolutions, but goals, aspirations, changes, and future growth.
Take a minute and think about your 2021. What will it look like? Where are you headed? Who is surrounding you?
2020 helped me realize exactly what I want to do in life; what I wish to create, who I wish to help, and what truly makes me happy. My aspirations used to be on a small scale. Like many of us musicians in the performance field, we pick a “track” to follow: Soloist, chamber musician, or orchestral musician. While I’ve always had a deep love for chamber music, my goal is to be an orchestral musician. For a while it stopped there. That was all I wanted, but what else am I passionate about? What do I have to offer the world? How can I help change the field for the better?
First my blog came about. I have a passion for writing the truth about what it’s like being in the performance scene, about going through school, and about injuries, anxiety, mental health and scheduling. Throughout 2020 I developed my own practice plans that helped me advance to new places in smaller amounts of time. Why not share what I learn with everyone? What helps me might help hundreds of other people, and that’s exactly my goal.
Then Brass Out Loud came to be. Between BOLD and Mind Over Practice, I had plenty to do. I was sometimes a little too busy, but I was creating exactly what I knew I wanted and needed. Not only what I wanted and needed, but what we all wanted and needed. However, here’s where it gets tricky. Sometimes when you get busy, it gets harder to get in touch with you. There were moments where I felt like a bad friend and I would reach out and apologize for being distant because of how busy I’ve been putting my heart and soul into something.
Read that again and listen to how silly it sounds.
I apologized to my friends for doing things that I love and found joy in.
There were many of my friends who understood. Who completely and utterly supported anything and everything I did. There was no pettiness, there was no competition, there was just love and support. That’s how it should be.
Have you ever been around someone who talks about other people's success? Who says someone doesn’t deserve something, or won't be as successful as them? It’s honestly disturbing. Especially if they’re considered a “friend”.
I’ve learned a lot about this through 2020. I’ve seen what I want, I’ve seen what I don’t want, and throughout it all I’ve become more motivated than ever. But I’ve seen what people can do to me and my spirit. I’ve had friends lift me up, but have also had friends who claim they support me, then later ask me to give something up.
If your friends love and support you, they’d NEVER ask you to choose between them and something you’re doing to benefit yourself and career. If they do, you have every right to let go of whatever that relationship is. Whether it's a friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, family member, or other, you have every right to walk away from a relationship that doesn’t suit you or support you.
Reminder that when people say things out of spite, it’s already been on their mind. Even if they say, “that’s not what I meant”, or “I just said that because I was mad. I don’t mean it”.
Commit to your friends.
Commit to your expectations.
Commit to what you want in your life, and let go of what not longer suits you.
Your friends aren’t your competition, they are a part of your spirit.
I am here to ride the wave with you. Through thick and thin, through great times and hard times, I’m in it for the long haul and I am here to support you in every move you make. That’s how it should be.
Don’t let people steal your thunder. Don’t let people dampen your success, or make you feel bad for going after what you want.
In the end, the people who love you and want to see you thrive will NEVER ask you to give up a part of yourself. Not even when they’re mad. And you should never have to apologize for being busy with things that are moving you towards success. Never.
So this year, instead of resolutions, set small achievable goals. Write down a list of aspirations, inspirations, and visions that you have for, and of yourself. What do you want your 2021 to look like? What do you want to achieve in 2021? Envision your perfect year.
I see myself making tapes that I am happy with for my DMA auditions. I see myself getting into the school I’m meant to be at. I see myself moving back to NYC (I miss it SO much). I want Mind Over Practice to flourish. I see my studio of private students growing, I see my coaching sessions taking off. I see Brass Out Loud becoming something bigger and better than it already is (I can’t be more specific right now. I can’t give too many secrets away!) I see myself happy, surrounded by friends who understand my drive and passion for what I do. And ultimately, I see myself making huge strides in my horn playing; smoothing out some of the bumps and continuing to become the player I know I am and can be. If we’re lucky, I see myself at an audition or two towards the end of the year.
I’m hopeful for the year ahead of us. I hope you make the best of every moment. Keep living your dream. Keep supporting your friends. Keep engaging in things that set you up for success, and leave behind the things that don’t serve you. You’re not tied to anything in life and your life should be built and designed with all the things you love and deserve. Go get them!
Reminder that if you’d like to sign up for coachings with me, please DM me on instagram, or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I’m also available for horn and piano lessons as well! In the meantime, manifest everything you want to happen to you this year. You’re the captain of your own ship. Sail it into the unknown.
Also, is there anything that you want to hear about? Let me know! DM me on instagram and let’s get talking. This blog is FOR YOU so I want you to let me know about what you want to see and hear about!
I’ll be back next week with a new entry every Friday at 12pm EST. You’ll find them on my website www.rebeccakaru.com. See you then and for now, have a productive week of positive practicing!